Emotional Balance (leg 2)

Emotional Balance

I had a step change in my ‘abilities’ in that I woke up feeling very much different to how I had felt for half a century.
There are three fundamental changes covering my cognitive, physical and emotional self. I covered physical last week. I picked up a 20kg box expecting it to feel heavy and it felt more like a 10kg box. I noticed this at the time but was busy so I carried on with my contracted duties.
I had wondered if work would feel different and this post covers that. The first two days were uneventful but I did experience a few ‘triggers’. Events that, historically, I react with a little annoyance too. I still did. So, perhaps disappointing but there you go. Tuesday, I realised that Wednesday was likely to be a massive challenge. It was far more challenging than I could have ever imagined. I was unconcerned Tuesday night and slept well. Wednesday brought challenge after challenge after challenge. Emotionally, I did not react to any of the challenges. Actually, disaster would be a better word to use. However, the word disaster is highly charged with emotion. If it could go wrong, it did. If I thought things could not get worse, they did. Emotionally, I was balanced. I was simply amused. This allowed me to act and react appropriately. I couldn’t have done a better job with a fully charged time machine and a bucket full of flux capacitors.
Friday brought a fresh test which I just handled. Previously, I would have been enraged and created a ‘director level’ problem. So, that was what work was like. The same but different. A few seconds of ‘stress’ rather than many hours. In fact, three weeks of furlough was enjoyable. As was the first week of work. A week of work and a week off were comparable. I have no preference between a week of work or a week of holiday. I wrote the same sentence several times because the old me would not believe it.

Synergy

The emotional balance is made easier by the physical balance discussed in last weeks blog. Each one reinforcing the other. Discussing two out of the three is not possible. There are three components that are mutually reinforcing. Physical, emotional and cognitive balance all reinforce each other. The ‘work challenge’ would have been met by a major emotional response. There was none. I had full confidence in my cognitive ability to make the best of a bad job. I knew that I was physically capable of carrying out whatever I deemed necessary. Thus I had no fear in my ability to do what was necessary and no fear that I would fail. Fear is induced by the emotional component, amplified by the cognitive centres which then feeds on the physical components of the body. Each of the three systems reinforcing the others, amplifying the fear.
Thus, I am attempting to describe the opposite of the fear cycle. I know fear releases cortisol which breaks down muscle tissue into glycogen which is used to power the fear response ever higher. This is only useful if a tiger is chasing you. Not useful if the printer runs out of paper at an in opportune moment. I know that but I know nothing of the opposite. It feels good and is what I believe has happened to me. There is fear and there is a lack of fear. I am now enjoying the opposite of fear. I am in the opposite of the fear cycle. I assume I don’t know what that is because nobody does and society is not interested in it. Whereas, we are all partial experts in the fear cycle. Society is very interested in fear. Just turn on the news whilst attempting to digest your evening meal to see fear in action. Actually, I strongly recommend that you don’t.

Example

We all know what worry is. We imagine something unpleasant. This is our cognitive self sabotaging our physical self. Our emotional self reinforces our cognitive belief with negative emotions and a thick soup of powerful hormones. In such a state of fear, we can readily imagine something new or re-imagine our previous unpleasant thought. All three systems working together to generate a world class worrier.
What I am describing is the opposite of worry and I REALLY DON’T KNOW HOW TO.
Caps Lock decided that capitals were required and I have agreed. What is the opposite of worry? Well, literally, you think something may occur which would be unpleasant. Your emotional self does not react as it knows you will handle it. Physically and mentally, your emotional self believes that you may well be measured but won’t be found wanting.
Well, we all know that worrying about something will not help. How come we don’t know what the opposite of worry is? Is it confidence? If it is, why aren’t we taught this. All school taught me was to worry about the Russians starting a thermo global nuclear war and aids.

Conclusions

The benefit of this emotional balance is considerable. ‘Worst day – ever’ at work transforms into an interesting one. I know we already know this but when a challenge does transform into an opportunity, it is a miraculous thing to be a part of.
Next week will see me covering the final part of our trio, cognitive balance.